I had a really hard parenting moment a few weeks ago.
There was a class
spelling bee and my son was eliminated during the first round. Spelling
is by far the hardest subject for him. He is an excellent reader and
super at math, but just doesn't like to practice spelling words. So we
did practice his spelling bee words, but probably not as much as we
could have.
I happened to be in his classroom working on a project
for the teacher. He was eliminated during the first round. I could
tell he was heart-broken. I saw the lip quiver and the pinching his
eyes to hold back tears. As much as I wanted to scoop him up, I knew it
wasn't appropriate timing.
It was time for me to head to my
daughter's classroom. The teacher excused him to use the restroom and to
get a drink so he could compose himself. I met him in the hallway. We
talked about how I have never won a race. But I still practice every
day. AND I still love running even though I don't win. We talked about
all the good things he does.
I was heartbroken to see him
fail. But we can't win or be the shining star every time. And I felt
guilty that I didn't work more with him on the words - I need to be more of a "Tiger Mother". I guess it was
a learning experience for both of us.
Oh, Toby. Each time you time him how to overcome defeat you win and he wins...BIG. Think what a gift he gets when he tanks it and then finds the power to redefine his desires and goals with your help and support. Those consequences are powerful teachers and skilled motivators coupled with the right facilitators {aka parents} and he's holding all aces when it comes to that!! You're doing great and so is he!!
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